God help us

32 dead at Virginia Tech today. Uncanny that I received the following email last night. This speech was given May 27, 1999 before the Subcommittee on Crime of the House Judiciary Committee.

DARRELL SCOTT TESTIMONY

Guess our national leaders didn’t expect this, hmm? On Thursday, Darrell Scott, the father of Rachel Scott, a victim of the Columbine High School shootings in Littleton, Colorado, was invited to address the House Judiciary Committee’s subcommittee. What he said to our national leaders during this special session of Congress was painfully truthful. They were not prepared for what he was to say, nor was it received well. It needs to be heard by every parent, every teacher, every politician, every sociologist, every psychologist, and every so-called expert! These courageous words spoken by Darrell Scott are powerful, penetrating, and deeply personal. There is no doubt that God sent this man as a voice crying in the wilderness. The following is a portion of the transcript:

Since the dawn of creation there has been both good & evil in the hearts of men and women. We all contain the seeds of kindness or the seeds of violence. The death of my wonderful daughter, Rachel Joy Scott, and the deaths of that heroic teacher, and the other eleven children who died must not be in vain. Their blood cries out for answers. The first recorded act of violence was when Cain slew his brother Abel out in the field. The villain was not the club he used.. Neither was it the NCA, the National Club Association. The true killer was Cain, and the reason for the murder could only be found in Cain’s heart.

In the days that followed the Columbine tragedy, I was amazed at how quickly fingers began to be pointed at groups such as the NRA. I am not a member of the NRA. I am not a hunter. I do not even own a gun. I am not here to represent or defend the NRA - because I don’t believe that they are responsible for my daughter’s death. Therefore I do not believe that they need to be defended. If I believed they had anything to do with Rachel’s murder I would be their strongest opponent.

I am here today to declare that Columbine was not just a tragedy — it was a spiritual event that should be forcing us to look at where the real blame lies! Much of the blame lies here in this room. Much of the blame lies behind the pointing fingers of the accusers themselves. I wrote a poem just four nights ago that expresses my feelings best. This was written way before I knew I would be speaking here today:

Your laws ignore our deepest needs, Your words are empty air.

You’ve stripped away our heritage, You’ve outlawed simple prayer.

Now gunshots fill our classrooms, And precious children die.

You seek for answers everywhere, And ask the question “Why?”

You regulate restrictive laws, Through legislative creed.

And yet you fail to understand,That God is what we need!

AMEN!

Men and women are three-part beings. We all consist of body, mind, and spirit When we refuse to acknowledge a third part of our make-up, we create a void that allows evil, prejudice, and hatred to rush in and wreak havoc. Spiritual presences were present within our educationalsystems for most of our nation’s history. Many of our major colleges began as theological seminaries. This is a historical fact. What has happened to us as a nation? We have refused to honor God, and in so doing, we open the doors to hatred and violence. And when something as terrible as Columbine’s tragedy occurs — politicians immediately look for a scapegoat such as the NRA. They immediately seek to pass more restrictive laws that contribute to erode away our personal and private liberties. We do not need more restrictive laws. Eric and Dylan would not have been stopped by metal detectors. No amount of gun laws can stop someone who spends months planning this type of massacre. The real villain lies within our own hearts. “As my son Craig lay under that table in the school library and saw his two friends murdered before his very eyes, he did not hesitate to pray in school. I defy any law or politician to deny him that right! I challenge every young person in America, and around the world, to realize that on April 20, 1999, at Columbine High School prayer was brought back to our schools. Do not let the many prayers offered by those students be in vain. Dare to move into the new millennium with a sacred disregard for legislation that violates your God-given right to communicate with Him. To those of you who would point your finger at the NRA — I give to you a sincere challenge. Dare to examine your own heart before casting the first stone!My daughter’s death will not be in vain! The young people of this country will not allow that to happen!”

Sunday pm

i am not a preacher
never been one
so i rarely share sermonettes
words of wisdom in my blogspot
it would be nice to teach
but i never was the best student
i just live
listen
walk
try to be obedient
amid my short comings and faithlessness
learning by bumping and bruising
so i'll write about what ever
show you the bruises

my brother in-law once told me some twenty years ago
that my songs were too naked
that i expose stuff that he wouldn't
i've always been that way
maybe i've left myself open by doing so
i have been called transparent
but i know that's not true
i'd like to be more
but there are places that i won't go here
that only God knows
issues that only He knows how to answer
wounds that only He can heal
words that only He can say
never the less
i am not as transparent

so here
in this strange place
i'll write about strange or familiar thought and struggles
on my heart and mind
among you who visit here
sometimes i'll be clear
sometimes cloudy
i always appreciate your kind response
not expecting answers mind you
just sharing the journey with you

this is about as open as i can be right now
forgive the mess
God's doing some cleaning

laugh

down through the years i have been accused
of hiding behind laughter
my light hearted ways
an easy escape
the rear stage door
so they say

since my youth
this joy
was all i knew to be
all i cared to be
to laugh
and make laugh
my engine

this medicine
the only balm i know
that can take the serious edge
off the world
laughter
the only tears i welcome
the only tears i hope
to ever instigate

yes
looking back i see
where i made a cheerful exit
left abruptly
leaving questions unanswered for later

once labeled socially immature
i have suffered many labels
still all i can do is laugh at it all
give it to God
and move on
this laughter is all i know
much of what i am

as i move through this life
the world ceaselessly attempts to steal
my big joy
so many
surrounded by so much seriousness

i am not a comic
but a breathing comedy
amid so much tragedy
i will live the only way i know
each day i blow upon the ashes and embers
hoping for a spark

i almost let them win
lulled into sadness
birthright for stew
yet i am always reminded
my children need to hear
my laughter more
hear the freedom
that make the pious nervous

joy to the world
in spite of the world
joy to the world
laugh till it hurts
there's no hiding here
no hiding here
it's God's gift
cold and sullen doesn't make one holy

it is my hope
to still be capable of laughter
even upon my final breath
joy eternal
i will claim and weld what was given me
upon my birth
now determined to be even more
of what i am
that which i know
now with even less reserve
cut loose
and set free
what joy
God himself gave to me

Don't say it David...DON'T SAY IT!!!!

My mother was telling me yesterday how she didn't particularly like The Passion...it was too Catholic. Personally, Catholics got the Jesus died for your sins and rose again part right and I think is the most important message to take home. The only disagreement I have with Catholicism is they get it wrong regarding the veil of The Temple. You know...the one that was torn from top to bottom when Jesus died (Matthew 27:50-51). It is my understanding that when Jesus completed his mission, a veil was no longer needed. Christ fulfilled the requirement of the law, paid the price, and now God and man do not have to be separated. Can you say New Covenant baby? These days I can have a relationship with my Creator without standing behind curtain number one. Catholicism seems to have merely replaced the old torn veil with yet another veil...only this time there's a woman standing behind it.

Holy Flicks Batman!

So many films about the life of Jesus. So many not so memorable. As a baby boomer, I watched all the DeMill-ish religious films growing up. So many were stiff and over-acted. There were some that are absolutely fantastic. Here are my three all time favorites.

1) Gospel Road (1973) This film was made by Johnny and June Cash back in 1973. Johnny said that this was the highlight of his entire career. This is now available on DVD if you're interested. Johnny and June made this movie for 500,000. out of their own pocket. At the time it was the first movie about Jesus made entirely in Israel.

2) Jesus of Nazareth (1977) This was mini-series with an all star cast. One of my favorite moments was Ernest Borgnine as the Roman Centurian.

3) The Passion of The Christ (2004) by Mel Gibson. I only watched this movie once, when it came out. I don't know if I will see it again any time soon. This isn't because it's a bad movie but because it is so painful to watch.

Goodbye Johnny

Johnny Hart, creator of the cartoon strip BC died Saturday at his drawing board. What a wonderful fellow. I appreciate the fact that Mr. Hart never caved in when it came to his beliefs. He took a lot of bashing for his testimonies in his work. http://alljoneses.com/images/blog/bc-easter2.gif I admire this mans life, his faith and his work. God bless you Johnny!

friday underway

Gina had only two patients this morning. She took off afterwards to venture off with our girls. I got a nice daddy-daughters day during the last Friday of Spring Break with Katie and Kelsey. We had a very nice time together that day. Gina gets far less mommy-daughter days with the girls due to work (www.otgadsden.info). I don't know where they are right now but I am sure there's lots of singing and laughing going on.

I'm holding down the fort at the office while Gina is away. Plenty of stuff to do other than answering the phone and updating this blog. It's nice having Tommy back among the blogging and my old friend Darryl B. dropping in. I really enjoy being able to keep up with friends online. It's a busy life and glad that we can visit e-visit like this.

something about me

i have always had to put into lyric
what i always needed to say
never having the talent for normal conversation

dbf

no apology

i remember running into an old church brother
years ago
we met on the college campus where he taught
we shook hands
and i felt a terrible distance
i didn't like it
leaving the fellowship seemed as if
there was a divorce of some depth
a strain on the conversation
maybe in heaven that will bond will be renewed
i don't like leaving places for such reasons
i hope it's not the same this time
i see the good
the bad
and i am sure they've seen both sides of my heart
i wrote yesterday what had been rolling in my mind for years
and when the break was made
my mind seemed fixed on that constant thought
leaving looking hoping to find home
amid places that are a strange land to me

probably the easiest answer i hear in my ear
is go
go somewhere and serve
go somewhere and love
don't look around much
just look for the individual
and ignore the ways of man
look to love
the way I made you
the way I have always loved you
sing your songs without apology
sing to me
and let me give you the words
like the words I gave Jeramiah
give when i say give
and pray always
worship with your life
and you'll have all you need

so

i love you
i love each of you
i am blessed that God placed me amid you
for a time
for so long

it's time to live more
and die again
to my comfort
to my self

there's always more to die to

so it will probably be in heaven
and the Temple He builds will be perfect
the way it should be
and all man will bow down
lay down
and learn what is his way
experience eternal worship
in the imediate presence of our Lord

let it all burn
that day
all we ever needed is you

beyond the walls

when i was a kid
i used to escape church at every chance
i remember countless days in sunday school
with my sunday school workbook before me
i never cared for the shiny attendance pins
never an incentive to me
i remember ducking out of services every chance i got
hiding in the drainage pipe when it rained
once discovered an old helicopter in the woods beyond the playground
really
it was a cold rain and i sat in the deteriorating cockpit
imagination spinning
somewhere over Korea
rain dotted and streamed upon
the cracked windshield

i remember roaming halls
hiding in the shadow of the stairs
i didn't want to be found skipping
public school was a bad time and church to me
just seemed like school on the weekend
i don't recall anyone ever finding me

when there was no way around it
and i had to go
it merely proved my dislike for it
i was not hiding from God mind you
i just didn't like man made church
even back then
sunday school
filing in for service
songs sermon and smiling handshakes
coming and going
it always seems so empty
always nice to kick off those sunday shoes
home coming always a relief
all that family around the table

vacation Bible school was the worst
not being home
sugar cookies, fruit drink, and raisins
i planned my escape once
while painting balsa Christmas ornaments
in the middle of June

i became a Christian around 13
and things never really changed
i always felt outside the box
and often still do

the worst dream of my youth
was about church
running up the steep hill for safety
only to find the doors locked
and a painter who turned and fell into the gravel dead
as i approached weary spent and afraid
the creature pursuing me never let up
and approached me
and there was no where to run
the church was never a haven
or a safe place

all the church was to me were songs and sermons
smiles and handshakes coming and going

i found real relationship outside those walls as a youth
i had fellowship with family
and kindred spirits at coffeehouse
i found what to me was real church
The Body
a place where God in His graciousness
gave me Church
even though
betrayal lurks anywhere

my father once told me while i was in my late teens
that i could quit going after i became 19
that day
i had hope and became unchurched for almost 10 years
he tried his best to lengthen the sentence
but he had already spoken is promise
and i politely reminded him
many times

i did not go
without remorse or thought
until i got married at 30
God whispered and said i was responsible for another soul
and so we started searching
i tried to be good about it
but always the songs, sermons, and handshakes coming and going
yet my mission was to be obedient

we finally found a place to pitch our tent
drifted in by way of a home meeting
my wife and i found kinship amid strangers
and then made their church home ours for a while
it was still songs, sermons and smiling handshakes
but it was easier to take when we connected
to some authentic sweet people behind the smiles
it was then that i became churched for a while
i enjoyed The Body but still tolerated church
they quickly tried sticking me in the mold
it was all out of love
and i tried to comply
but i never fit
too odd i know
and they seemed baffled that their old mold wouldn't work
as much as there was love
i never seemed to conform to their method
after a few years
we drifted away
God had given me a chore
and i followed it as far as that path took me
and before i knew it
the fellowship i knew was far behind me
i was unchurched again

we eventually found our way back home to Gadsden
the coffeehouse that once was
was quickly becoming no more
and i did find a church in it's very place
filled still with many a familiar face
my square ways
seemed to fit for a long while
no one tried to force me into smooth round holes
there seemed at first
no round holes there
i stayed for a decade

there is a strain and suppression
when there is too much control
and few are released
but we are just men
just men
in robes
hiding our flawed humanity
in His holiness
i know this
it is sadly everywhere
i know

me too

today i have been lead away from that fellowship
whose people i love dearly
but it hasn't been my church
for quite some time
and will still visit my dear friends
to worship with
from time to time

but it's been a long time since I've felt a true part
there the worship isn't simply song
but very intimate
closeness to the foot of His throne
i have learned a great deal from that place
and have experienced Church often there
but
i should have moved on a long time ago
because it's not where i need to be
i keep being reminded of that
every time i returned

the building was once the old coffeehouse
where i had church
and the church where i experienced a wonderful intimacy later in life
and it's time
my wife needs something different
my children need to be fed
and i pick up my staff
and wander into the wilderness
again
searching
again
tempted to find a drain pipe
but constantly reminding myself
that i have a family to feed
and gifts to give freely

churches today seem different
but haven't changed all that much
maybe the music
the preachers now younger than me
but still something inside me
doesn't want any part of it
now it's a rock concert, music video, sermon and a smiling handshakes

stepping outside the walls
and moving outward toward tomorrow
the footprints from that vineyard
quickly disappear in the sand
my wife looks at me and asks
what now
my daughters seem oblivious to the new day
just happy to be family
and Katie just content to be where God dwells

show us where you dwell Lord
what man made temple
does your light shine down over
is there one
no gadgets, gimmicks or agendas
programs
where may i serve you
where can i serve you
where can i truly worship you
i will be free where ever you send me
and hammer at walls where walls need to fall
where Lord
what now

it doesn't have to be a church
within the walls of man
just a place to worship you
amid your family