the naked tree

Gina and I have been married for twenty-two years.  In that entire time, we've never had a tree topper we liked.  Our Christmases come and go and almost every year we go without one. Usually, this time of year, I'll browse through a few ornament sections in stores to see if there's something that strikes my fancy.  Nothing.  I've come to a place that nothing will ever be satisfactory and we'll end up just going without a tree topper.  Gina feels the same.  Every now and then I'll point one out to her, and she'll say "no".  For some reason, nothing seems good enough to grace the top of our artificial tree.

Growing up, the Finlayson household had an ugly little plastic angel that must have been purchased sometime in the 1950's.  Every year we'd stick it up there, attach it to the top with a pipe cleaner.  I wasn't picky about it then.  I guess it was comforting to see it up there year after year, atop all the trees down through the years.

There were some Christmases we donned the tree with this little dollish looking angel.  It wasn't very pretty and I could never get it straight.  We had purchased it at a Kmart discount bin after a Christmas earlier in our marriage.  Neither of us liked it.  I don't know why we bought it.  For years it just stayed packed away amid all the excess Christmas stuff we never use.

Gina once made a huge bow to go up there, with ribbon that furled down to the base of the tree.  Though it seemed tasteful, it just looked like something out of a magazine.  It was pretty, but just lacked warmth.  I don't know why I've been so picky about it.  It's silly I know.  Everything I've seen seems so gaudy or tacky.  If I do find something that might do - it won't do for Gina.  

For some reason, in the back of my mind, I think of a tree topper as some sort of crown... the crowning glory of the tree.  It should be special.  Nothing seems to be that.  I'm sure our children haven't missed what has rarely been up there.  Perhaps one day when they are married with little ones of their own, their Christmas trees will go topless too.