other mother

When a guy considers marrying, he's not sure how he'll stand with the mother and father of his bride to be.  I considered it, but it wasn't long into dating Gina that I realized I was loved by Mrs. Hale.  The in-law part gets stuck in my throat because Mrs. Hale is a second mom.

When I started dating Gina, her mother took me right into her wings.  Most nights at the end of a date, I'd usually end up in their den talking with Mrs. Hale.  Gina would usually go to bed at nine or nine-thirty and Mrs. Hale was a night owl like me.  We'd get into long conversations.

At the time she was still reeling from a divorce.  I felt my listening to her gave her a sounding board.  If memory serves, that's what most of those late night conversations were about.  Nevertheless, Mrs. Hale has never been a downer.  She never wanted to be a burden, and never has been a burden.  As long as I've known her, she's always made the best of even the worst situations, always tried to be joyful in all circumstances.  Mrs. Hale is the kind of gal that's great to have around.  How many mother in-laws would you want to take on a vacation?  Mrs. Hale is always easy going and always part of the merriment.

She couldn't wait for us to give her grand children.  I think she was getting doubtful that we were going to have children.  We didn't have Katie until the sixth year of our marriage.  When we did start having children, she showered them with so much love.  There's one thing that makes it harder to call someone an 'in-law' is when they love your children so much.  Betty Hales is more than just my mother in-law, she's more than just my wife's mother and my children's grandmother. To use the word in-law doesn't define my relationship to her.  Down through the years, she's become my other mother.

Seeing her small unconscious form in the ICU is unsettling.  She's trying to recover from surgery through infection and pneumonia. Her blood pressure is erratic.  Beneath the tubes and cords, she looks so weak, as if she's fading.  Her future is uncertain.  At this moment, things can go either way.  We are all hoping and praying for her.  I am I recounting the good times, and how she has enriched all the lives of those around her.   She has enriched my life.  She loved her in-law son as her son.  She opened her heart to me.

Get well Betty.

Kelsey's a 10

Kelsey went to bed a little melancholy last night while mommy tucked her into bed.  She asked mommy if it was okay to cry.  Gina asked her why, and she said that she didn't want to wake up 10 years old.  She didn't want to grow up. So Kelsey went to bed after a little cry, comforted in the warmth of her mother's arms.

Today was different. Gina had taken the girls for a birthday biscuit and gravy at Jacks before taking them to school.  She also dropped off lots of cupcakes for her 4th grade class. Kelsey came home upbeat and happy.  She said that her class sang Happy Birthday to her.  Last night was history and so was 9, 10 was just another age and another day.

When Gina got home we had PaPa Johns cheese pizza as per her request.  We had carrot cake. She opened her presents and we had a joyous little occasion.  We prayed thanksgiving for the youngest member of our family.  She is such a smart, creative and funny little girl.  We are blessed to have her in our lives.

message on 11/11

"Do not fret because of evildoers, be not envious toward wrongdoers. For they will wither quickly like the grass and fade like the green herb. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.  Delight yourself in the LORD; and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD,  Trust also in Him, and He will do it. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light and your judgment as the noonday. Rest in the LORD and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who carries out wicked schemes. Cease from anger and forsake wrath; do not fret; it leads only to evildoing. For evildoers will be cut off, but those who wait for the LORD, they will inherit the land. Yet a little while and the wicked man will be no more; and you will look carefully for his place and he will not be there."

-Psalm 37 excerpt

No matter what has befallen our individual lives; no matter what dangers arise against our nation, we are to trust in God.  No man can bring about the hope and change we as a nation really need.  No matter what befalls us individually or collectively, we are to not only trust in Him and fear not...but are to delight ourselves in Him!  Yes, this is the time that tries men's souls, but let us each pursue God through these trials and cultivate faithfulness!

an unexpected reading

My daughter has been asking me to read J.R.R. Tolkien's 'The Hobbit' during the holiday season this year.  We were going to do it last year, but we didn't get around to it.  About three years ago, by a Winter's fire I read four of the Narnian Chronicles to Katie.  We ate muffins and drank hot chocolate and hot teas as I read on and on.  I read for hours on end.  Katie remembers that time fondly and has since been wanting to repeat the experience.

When Gina and I were first married with little money in our pockets to go out do things. We found ourselves looking for books to check out at the Bowling Green Public Library.  That's when  I came across a copy of The Hobbit and asked Gina if she'd ever read it.  She said she hadn't, and I insisted that she should.  So after dinner every night we sat in our little apartment and I would read to her.  It's a good memory.

So tonight I went to the bookshelf and pulled down my copy of The Hobbit and began to read.  Katie beamed like a flashlight.  Not long afterward Gina came home and prepared banana sandwiches and milk and brought the food downstairs.  She scolded me for starting without her.  I took the time to catch her up and then off we went.   Tonight we read The Unexpected Party and onto Roast Mutton.  We are going to read on as the weeks go by, finding time whenever we can to enjoy this wonderful Middle Earth adventure together.

Hopefully we'll finish it before the movie is released next month.

i love a girl

I love a girl that loves to laugh, that's why I married my girl.  I once asked Gina long after we married why she even took notice of me. Gina said that she always wanted to end up with a fellow who could make her laugh.  I just so happen to be a guy that always wanted a girl that loves to laugh.  I'm glad we've got each other for better for worse, for richer or poorer.  I could not imagine this journey without her.  She's the girl for me.

not so long ago

Katie aka: Blossom - October 31, 2000

Gina and I used to have a Power Puff girl for a daughter.  I knew her as Katie, but she wanted to be called Blossom.  She called her mother Bubbles and she insisted that I be Buttercup.  Blossom was the self proclaimed leader of the Power Puff Girls.  During a weekend trip to Chattanooga, we came across a Blossom outfit.  Mother pulled it off the rack and bought it.  Katie was  delighted. No sooner had we gotten back into the van did she want to put it on.  She wore the outfit all the way back home.  I'd look back into the rear view mirror and behold Katie's bushy, curly hair pop out from all sides under that Blossom hair piece.  She wore it all the way home and kept it on most of the time for months afterward.  If she wasn't wearing the Bubbles outfit, she was donning the orange Bubble hair. 

Of course she wore the outfit Halloween night.  It was her chance to show the world that they had a super hero in their midst.  It's hard to believe she's already 16.  She's a brilliant young lady who's a wonderful big sister.  Now if I could only keep her from wearing that Thor helmet!

Honoring Guytie

Memorial Pays Tribute To Former Cheraw Doctor 
Cheraw Chronical
Thursday, December 11, 1969

A beautiful, living memorial has been established in Columbia in memory of the late Dr. Clarence Lee Guyton, Jr., a native of Williamston, by his many friends and colleagues.

A fountain has been placed in the center of the grounds of the J. Marion Sims building, the new State Health Department headquarters.  Dr. Guyton, at the time of his death in 1964, was Assistant State Health Officer for South Carolina.  Dr. Guyton practiced medicine in Cheraw in the 1930's.

Mrs. Guyton, the former Jennie Llewellyn Finlayson of Cheraw, unveiled the plaque which bears the inscribed dates of Dr. Guytons's service to the state: 1936-1964.  Afterwards, the Rev. Thomas A. Summers, Chaplain, offered the following prayer:

"Eternal Spirit, from whom we come, to whom we belong, and in whose service is our peace, we arrive at this moment with many memories of a devoted servant.  We remember with grateful affection this man - his uprightness of character, his fidelity and loyalty to the Department of Health, his friends and his wife, his good-will shown to co-workers, and his high honor as a person.

May this memorial, which is being dedicated on this day, be an enduring witness before all people of the greatness of Dr. Guyton's person-hood and leadership.  May the waters which spring forth from it's depths be a symbol of his refreshing and flowing spirit, and may we all be ever reminded of what we have inherited from the fruits of his labors.

So, O God, let thy mercy rest upon us, a company of friends, who today remember with gratitude thy servant, Dr. Guyton.  In responding to the influence which he handed over as a treasure to the ages, may we dedicate our life anew to the principles for which he stood.  In the memory of him who led us beside the cool waters of faith, courage, and service, and to Thy Holy Name we pray. Amen."
NOTE: I found this newspaper clipping among Pat's papers.  I wish that it had a picture of the fountain that was dedicated to him.  If I find an fountain pic, I'll post it. Uncle Guytie died on October 8, 1964 due to cancer.  Here's a link to a previous post about Dr. Clarence and Jennie Llew Guyton.  It's from a letter my aunt Jennie Llew wrote to me a while back.

mother and son

Patillo Ainsworth was the youngest of the Finlayson clan.  He adored his mother.  You can sense the gentleness and closeness in this picture of Ainsworth and Jennie Wait.  His devotion never changed; from childhood into adulthood.  I've read a good many letters he mailed to Cheraw, SC from aboard his ship during the war.  I could feel it in the very paper - the love and concern that was there.  It was an adoration that remained into old age and to his last day.

I believe in God.  I believe in His Son.  I believe that Jesus has gone before and prepared a place for us; where we unwrap the promises of Heaven, where our joy will be made complete and eternal.  In Heaven families are gathered back together and all made one...a grand reunion.

more Burruss

 Burruss Finlayson 1868-1950

Here's another image of Burruss Finlayson.  This image looks about a year or two younger than in the post I made last Sunday.  I'm surprised how many photos we have of him now.  Growing up, I remember only two framed photos around our house.  My grandfather was born three years after the War of Northern Aggression ended.  His father, Murdoch Uriah Finlayson had been a dry goods merchant before the war.  He moved his family from Wilmington, NC to Cheraw, SC when Burruss was a child.  It's Cheraw where Burruss grew up and became a merchant like his papa.  Burruss married twice.  His first wife Florence died, as did his young son Herbert.  He later married my grandmother Jennie Llew Foster.  They had seven children together: Rutha, Florence, Murdoch,Wofford, Westbrook and Ainsworth.

being and becoming

“There ought to be a law against any man who doesn’t want to marry Myrna Loy.”
-James Stewart

Mryna Loy had it all: smart, funny and drop dead gorgeous.  She was stunning.  That's what got her noticed by Rudolph Valenteno back in the silent film era.  Her early work involved playing mostly bad girls - the seductive vamps.  Mryna started in film in 1925, and it wasn't until 1934 that the audience experienced the full range of her talent.  Someone noticed that she had more than a pretty face and cast her as Nora Charles opposite of William Powell in The Thin Man.  Wow!

About ten years ago some friends and I were sitting around at a party.  The subject of handsome men and beautiful women in the movies came up.  The ladies present mentioned the guys they thought were pleasing to the eyes.  The guys mentioned who they thought were attractive.  Beauty of course is subjectively in the eye of the beholder.   I couldn't think of anyone on screen today that possessed any quality near what once was.  There's no one today that can match the kind of talent we had on the screen back in the Hollywood of yesterday.  Mryna Loy is at the top of my list of the most beautiful and the most talented women.  I watch her today and I am still captured by her beauty - in every stage of her life.  She aged gracefully on film and her rolls just got richer.  She was an actress with such incredible range and dimension.

"Life, is not having and getting, but a being and becoming."
-Myrna Loy

One of my favorite rolls of hers is The Best Years of Our Lives where she plays the wife to returning soldier played by Frederic March.  She's not the primary character in this film, but her roll as a loving wife to a husband dealing with a transition from soldier to citizen.  Both Frederic and Myna gave a very real, a very tangible performance.  It's a beautiful thing.